Tuesday, November 27, 2012

It's business, not personal

I don't think so...

If you put your effort into creating something, investing your time in building it, it becomes personal. Why wouldn't it be?!

I'm sure there is a good reason for the project to get shelved, for the idea to get tossed, for the people to be let go. But instead of using empty words, try explaining it with the respect deserved.

It almost always is personal.

Saturday, November 17, 2012


Time is the single most precious, most valuable resource you have. Sadly, it's also the most perishable — ticking away whether you like it or not (even now when you are reading this...).

Time cannot be bought. It cannot be topped-up or refunded or returned. Once you've spent it, it's gone — there is no going back or changing your mind.

We seem to ignore this fact. We seem to just let time pass by, figuring we'll make the change tomorrow — live a more fulfilling life later, when we find the time...

Why look for it, or try to get it? You already have it! The question is: are you spending it wisely — are you focusing it on the things that matter most? More importantly: Are you using it to make your dreams come true?

Friday, November 9, 2012

The milk is spilt! Time to find a new cow.

There is no use crying over spilt milk — it won't pour itself off the ground back into the pitcher. Whatever has happened, happened and cannot be reversed.

Here's a tip: accept that the milk has spilt for a reason, that the choices made were a necessary stepping stone on your path. Though it is hard to see at the time, you will eventually understand that they served you down the line.

Accept it, welcome any lessons, and move on to the next big thing.

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

The pitfall of the missing parent figure

If you work for your father or mother, chances are they are more your boss than they are your parent. Distorted, I know, but there is no avoiding it. The family business seeps into every corner of our lives and with it our respective roles at work (the family dinner table is just another meeting room). The biggest issue with this is that we end up missing out on a parent. A parent who looks out for our interest above all else.

Over time this creates a deficit — one that we continuously seek to fill. But in our quest to quench this thirst we at times get confused. This happens when we come across a person (who could be our parent) and "allow" him/her to fill the void. We confuse their empathy/sympathy as "parent signals", which our little antennas are more than happy to receive... When this happens we drop our guard, allowing the child to get what it wants, while putting reason (the adult) aside. With reason on a leave of absence we risk making the wrong choices/decisions.

This could happen in different situations: interviews, negotiations, business/casual meetings; basically, any place a could-be-parent is present. And we must be wary of this so that we don't put ourselves (and our positions) in jeopardy...

The void that is a missing/lacking parent is a painful one, but it is one that we must learn to live with. More importantly, we need to accept that there is no such thing as a replacement parent.

Accepting this will only make you stronger.